Social Anxiety II

      [ second part of Social Anxiety ] 

      The restrictions, laws, norms, create structure that all individuals to be happy and satisfied. But they don`t care about individuals as such (as SOULS), but only as body. That creates exactly the gap between “me as part of society” and Me as separate individual. I ll call the second my Soul-self, the first my Social-Self. The gap becomes bigger the more individual is grown and the more he has relations with society and all institutions. Because the Soul-self realizes his uniqueness, from one side, and his “mind freedom”, but also the Social-self realizes his uniformity, oneness and coexistence with others. So We are separate and in the same time we are part of all as One.

Exactly that view creates duality in human mind. And we cant understand duality, as we accept it as contradiction. In fact duality is very true, because it lies in the basis of the Earth plane. Each coin has two sides. Human body is related totally to energy of two -Ying, Yang. Genders by nature are also two.

    That’s how there is a gap between the souls feeling as unique Soul-self, separate, different, special, and complete – are coexisting with the feelings of merging of the Soul with others in Social-self – in crowds of groups, family, country, feeling of uniformity.  This gap is quite normal, but it creates uncertainty. In this level of spiritual evolution, people don’t understand it well, and it creates feeling of anxiety.

     Social anxiety is related to our view to others, and all range of emotions that others provoke in us, and that we provoke in others;  with way of communication and connection with others. With the way we are accepted, liked, loved. In the way our efforts are appreciated. In the way we love, appreciate efforts of others. In the way implementing positive connections with others. In the way of expressing negative qualities in connections with others. (example of such are if we speak to someone with kindness, show understanding, tolerance and balanced mood; and if we speak to others with anger, aggression, showing sadness or indifference to them…) All these aspects of communication matter for the growing of Social-Self.

Because we can be much aware (or try to be) of our Soul-Self, we feel our differences, and uniqueness, we know our weaknesses and strength, even we are mindful, we can be on a higher level as individuals. That means we can be spiritually advanced, if we realize where we are as a Soul. But in the same time people can be totally unaware their Social-Self, or they don’t recognize their Oneness with all, they don’t accept their social roles, or don’t feel they can be effective part of society. In this energy level of Earth, most people are not socially aware. They live just as soul-Self, no matter if mindful or not. That reflects in supressing the negative feelings, qualities from the Social-self, denying the Social oneness, and failing in good communication with others. That factors are basis of feeling of social anxiety – and depression.

As we live here as social-self most of the time, and that is related to our family life, cultural life, work and all things, we cant feel separated from it.

Social anxiety is created mostly because of the social masks syndrome. In any group and society, people tend to hide their faces, traits and qualities, because the instinctive fear to lose their freedom from others. People are vulnerable when they are together. They are vulnerable when they connect with each other, when they have relationships, family and friends, work environment. Because all these spheres may appear them as individuals, and activate the Social-self. That’s why each individual adapts social mask, which does not mean two-faced behaviour or lies. That means the Social self tries to prevent from being hurt or manipulated by others, or prevents seeing the negative qualities in him. Its natural no one wants to be seen in negative light.

    Wearing such mask from each one, suggests that no one shows their Soul-self (unique individual self) but all people try to show Social-self, which with the mask looks the fake one. In reality that social -self is just real self, but hidden and vulnerable self, that has fear from social judgement, and norms. That is self with many hidden aspects. For example in a job interview you don’t expose your Soul-self, or you don’t speak about your personal preferences. That`s why we need to accept as normal to have the social mask. But Not to have fake behaviour or fake feelings or fake connection with others. So that mask has limits.

The feeling of suppressed or hidden Soul-self in process of wearing the social mask, will create surely social anxiety. Here the key is to make balance between your personal values, and uniqueness, and acceptance of oneness with others. Trying to be part of social structure, means being Open to others, being vulnerable, being exposed in a way.

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© Nina* Lea-nour

    Angel`s medium

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