Monogamy and Synchronizing in partnership -III

      So the socially approved monogamous model of stable, life-long relationship is not suitable or even has unhealthy aspects, due to deeper need of the soul for expansion and spiritual development – which comes from multiple relationships. Even so, the person will have again special lessons to learn and to develop to some point, but it wont bring the inner change, or inner spiritual power, if it stays in a life-long relationship. This is the same as all kind of changes, which people try to RESIST. Another thing I want to say is, resistance of change (or fear of change and from that personal growth), is also the basis of the stable long-term relationship (marriage). Fear of change and feeling insecure and unstable, which is the one of the basic social fear in “modern society”.

That’s how by beings in this modern socially approved stable family core, people start to find ways to “escape” the social matrix (including escape the lows and values) by many ways. That suppressed spiritual or any kind of development and change will appear as :

1. inner conflict, not knowing who you are and what is your mission, obesity, depression, sleep disorder and disorder of Thyroid (throat charka);

2. Conflict with others – being selfish and acting mostly from point of personal ego, relying only on personal power, and imposing your own views on others (believing just your way of life is the “right one”)

3. Conflict with the inner values – that may be visible in adultery, deception, telling lies, hiding the truth, not sharing, being attracted to lust and increased sexual desires (to your partners or others), or opposite feeling of lack of sexual desire. 

     These all are results from monogamous life long relationship, which is in fact a stamp of society on the individual life. This kind of monogamous model of relationship becomes a stereotype, which brings social stability and permanent resistance in the matrix.

By making stable family core people cant easily escape the matrix, because they will be caught in social work, situations and material world issues, which works like spider web around. (that’s how social media – facebook mechanism looks like). This is the productive way to keep the society and average individual ignorant, or to control and manipulate his desires and needs. Also that can control the image and concepts of good and bad, and values.

That’s how all society is sure that being in life-long partnership (marriage) is good and being in multiple relationships is “bad”, which is very far from truth (universal truth).

      The way people synchronize together in the relationships is significant to understand the principle of monogamy and serial monogamy.  People in time of spiritual evolving, value the concept of one-and only partner and relationship, because they feel it`s connected to devotion. They way person is devoted to one partner can be seen in concept of monotheistic religions and oneness of God. Strangely in Islam the monotheistic concept is well working with early polygamy practices (or historical religious polygamy, which is related only to men). Even so contemporary Islamic societies don’t view polygamy as socially approved, but still as approved by religious leaders and Shariah. But this practice shows one very real and row condition that existed. 

     Devotion to one partner can be very mischievous, because how many people don’t actually “commit adultery in their heart?” (as Jesus says…) How many people in reality do not desire another partner, a different partner, don’t feel unstable, threatened, and how many do not stay within the life-long partnership only because they fear change or avoid being alone, financially unstable or fear social judgment, or afraid being alone parents, sacrifice their real desire for what they believe is good for children? Please observe well, try to answer by yourself.

    Or how many partners changed, or have different spiritual vibration, or become a different person. Or how many in a life-long relationship keep the same feeling of love, passion and support? Or how many stay inside relationship, because “there is no better choice”, or because they are used to each others qualities, or because of endless compromises of Self.

Is that the real value of life-long relationship?  No, that’s the social matrix of life-long relationship – spider web.

Thank you for tuning in! Feel free to like, share this article, or post a comment below!

Stay blessed and filled with divine Light!

nina Lea-nour *

m E d i u m 

Monogamy and Synchronizing in partnership -II

       Reason why polygamy cant exist in our society is easy to understand – it doesn’t meet the values and requirements of society, it has conflicts with personal morality, and it has conflict with the human ego. (Reference - see information on some still living communities with active poligamy practices - some American mormons.) People usually come in “marriage relationship” because they want to have legal and socially approved connections, 2. they want to feel stable in family core, and bring up children, 3. they want to have life long partner, who to share life responsibility with; So in such stable, approved status of relationships, passion and long term love are finally not the most important. (even they are also appreciated well).

The next point in spiritual and psychological perspective is that this kind of relationships strive for qualities stability and permanency, on account of qualities flexibility, passion, and personal development.

       It`s true that such relationships if they are life long, they have very good point of learning with one partner, and focusing on the children education. But also they don’t have much space for personal growth, and they are not flexible. We could say even in multiple cases – maybe even 90% from all such couples, the energy of life long or extended monogamous relationship is stagnant and with rather negative influence on the individuals.

       People are meant and “programmed” to have multiple experiences in relationships with different, multiple partners, in different life stages. That means any soul has many, multiple Soul mates, as well as many Karmic relationships (from past lives), and many other experiences of new choices. This is the spiritual perspective on relationships, which is out of the social lows and norms, and out of “normal” views of humanity. That means relationships from spiritual perspective are opposite of what we can call “approved” , as they are made to bring you different soul lessons, karma cleansing, self-knowledge, growth and achieving higher qualities as forgiveness, compassion, self-love, and unconditional (Christ) love. That`s how the spiritual pattern works. It doesn’t care of social connection or social matrix. It looks from very higher perspective, the one of Soul lessons.

      That’s how such stagnant and stable in itself family core/ relationship wont be very spiritually stimulating; on the contrary – the relationships that brings multiple soul lessons – including the lesson of letting go, releasing old – will be much more appreciated. That’s how most (I don’t say all, as they are so many different cases!) but most advanced souls are actually going through many different relationships, partnerships and lessons in a life time. Or some of them are even just “out of relationships” or need to find the suitable partner, or not in a stable family core. In most cases such souls are more able to have time and focus on spiritual aspects of life in any kind –religion, self-growth, education. While people in stable family core, are usually busy with many real life tasks and obligations of life, they wont have much time to be spiritually devoted. Of course there are different lessons and souls, I speak about the majority.

      Something more –the two people need to be always in alignment with each other within the couple, and never change, or change simultaneously both, in order to remain in one spiritual plane. That is really how the spiritual and advanced partnerships will look like! They can be life-long, monogamous, and spiritually devoted, as two people will be in the same vibrational level. But how many times people do change in a life time? Is it possible for growing soul to stay unchanged and in the same level for all the life? Yes, it is possible the soul to stay in one life long partnership, and to undergo multiple lessons and obstacles, and to not change” still the spiritual level – that means the souls are just not reached to the way of spiritual growth, and they have other ways to learn and expand. That does not mean the souls will be “bad or good” in any way. Just they wont be on the spiritual growth way, and not in the life of accelerating the spiritual potential, path or intuition. As I said that rarely happens , as advanced souls don’t experience smooth way of growth through relationships.

      Another reason is: just one relationship and one partner cant bring to the soul all needed lessons for spiritual growth. Even more – just one partner could bring also energy of stagnancy, block changes in life flow, and not allow life of soul to unfold in its natural way. That is so, because each soul has already several life experiences that create several karmic relationships (people from past lives), and many soul mates. And the soul will be naturally attracted to these soul mates in some stages of life. That attraction can appear as friendship, or temptation (to go out of restriction of relationship), or as suppressed attraction that becomes blocked. In all these points it will remain inactively in subconscious mind. But all things that are inactive there can become “active” or will be unlocked by special circumstances when subconscious mind is “touched”.

So all that relationships of past will be in inactive state and waiting for their “turn” to become part of persons life.

Thank you for tuning in! Feel free to like this article, share it, or post a comment! Stay blessed. 

nina Lea-nour *

m E d i u m

Monogamy and Synchronizing with your partner I

In this article I`ll observe very important question, that has different discussions and points in many religions, institutions, and psychological concepts – about humans monogamy and polygamy.
There are several views and concepts on that topic, as it can be seen from quite different perspective.

       In this article I have to define the terms monogamy and polygamy, and what ideas I connect them to. Monogamy is a relationship between two people, on mutual relationship as a couple, including sexual relationship, in aspect of partnership in long term; This relationship is connected with socially approved norms and behavior, and extended with having just one “marriage partner (or any kind of partner), in time and for all life.

Polygamy is relationship between two or more people, representing their relationship, including sexual aspects, as patterns from short or long term partnership, which is always related between three or more people. This kind of relationship could be extended in time, but its rarely linked with socially approved behavior and legality.

There is also the term called serial monogamy, which is having multiple relationships, at different times of life. I`ll discuss here the aspects of monogamy, polygamy and serial monogamy from higher energy perspective,  and human values.

So what we call “monogamy” is usually and mainly related with the aspect of “normality” and social norms, and one of the most underlined aspects of it are in the official marriage or partnership. Here we are viewing things out of the social norms and taboos, but with the elements of psychology of relationships. So I want to determine – monogamous relationships are formed and developed in cultural societies at later stage, as a form of observing exact social lows and norms. Cultural society needs to identify the couple and the instinct of having children in the single family, formed by mother, father and children. That’s how the social picture looks, which is growing throughout the historical periods.

The significance of that single family and children relationship becomes very strong in later times, with the significance of certain understanding about human moral values. In such way monogamous relationships are not only approved, but they remain the strongest pillars of family core. That’s also because of the fact, these relationship can be –stable, extended in time, and keep the same permanent status life long. In this way these monogamous relationships make social low and social relationships also in stable plane. One of the significant aspects of monogamy in society is – having just one and only one marital partner for the life. This will bring most stability in all other practical life spheres, as you wont be distracted by searching for another partner. Secondly the person is believed to be more devoted to bring up and educating his own children, if he is in stable monogamous partnership.

     That’s how the situation look from social perspective. There are many more sides to be considered.

     From psychological and spiritual perspective things look a bit different.

I have to determine, that the early humans were Not monogamous. They were practicing different kind of polygamous relationships, but also they were in need of adopting some restrictions, taboos and social practices. Polygamy is in fact related to the early stages of human DNA and was the real primal power and mind of early humanity. So humans are not monogamous by nature in history, but they are cultivated to develop to monogamous family core, because of social lows, taboos and restrictions. So monogamy is avoiding conflicts between sides, between couples (similarly to animal world fighting for females and territory). Monogamy in its deeper patterns and structure is not the primal state of humanity, and it is “build up” and strengthened with time. This state has positive and negative sides and effects on humans.

I`ll observe here in more details the negative or down sides of monogamy. First of all monogamous relationships start to gradually and steadily turn into “life long” socially approved partnerships (marriage), in which people stay in the couple (marriage) for all the life. The psychological pinpoint here includes the bringing up of children, that are normally to be just from one couple, and abnormally (extraordinary) to be from different couple. What that means? I ll give in example with case of people who are married two times and have children from both marriages (or relationships). Such cases exist, they are quite visible, but also they are not socially approved – the simple point is such cases are viewed as already memorable, strange or “brave”, as well as different than the social values. Not think about how many cases you know about person with 3 marriages or relationships, with children from all of them? And how many such marriages without children? You can see such cases will be even more rare, and that is so, because they are not socially approved or stimulated. That lies in many psychological reasons, including the state of human Ego, and acceptance.

nina Lea-nour *

m E d i u m