Love Longing relationships -III

2. Equal spiritual values (believes)

   I want to underline, spiritual values do not mean “religion” or religious belonging, but spiritual principles and values that your heart observes. Doesn’t matter to which religion you belong, you still can have equal spiritual values. In the same way all religions are ways to divine Source, they are way to seek and find what humanity needs to fill in his divine wisdom. Believes are rooted principles of love, peace, tolerance and understanding between all. That’s why all religions have the same root, they all share equal practices.

You have to determine, feel and observe if your partner or beloved has the same spiritual values as you. That’s a quite important step. For example if he is in sect of “radical Islam” or likes strict observance of Sharia” from Muslims, he would rather support domestic violence (on woman), humiliation and killing, slavery of unbelievers women and many more. Then would you support him and stand by him in all his actions? I give this extreme example, but in reality many relationships are based on different unequal spiritual believes. We can also fall into illusion that we support our beloved values, simply because we love him all (with all his weak and strong points). That will be sure illusion and misconception. We cant support someone just because we are attached to him. It’s the other way around – we love him, and cherish him because we have equal spiritual believes. It`s a bit complicated to not be confused which is the right way. We have to first find in our partner and relationship such equal believes and values, and then our heart to feel free to truly love.

   Believes and what we cherish, what we think its worth in the world, is the ax of the relationship. We can belong to different religions, but still to have equal understanding for the main human rights and values. Also we can be from the same religion and share very different spiritual values.

In this ages religious “belonging” doesn’t matter much as in the past. That is because of integration of all humanity in one global Village – the Earth. All distances become closer trough communication and internet. Ideas are spread fast as the light. That’s how we cant stay in one place, but should develop higher mind and better understanding about another.

Spiritual believes are the core of our soul. Its important our views to be equal and supported by our partner, specially if we are in family relationship. If that’s not true, the relation would be in danger with the time. Because the things are changing for the person, so the believes are the constant rock in human soul, that makes us stronger. If our believes also change with time (for positive or negative doesn’t matter) , so they also should be equal to believes of our soul mate (partner).

The best relationship will grow on entirely equal spiritual practices and understanding. It wont be the same if for example my partner dislikes meditations or prefers loud music, and I` m more quiet person and love practicing meditations or yoga. That will bring imbalance in our relationships with the time.

I.                   Mutual connections ~

These are special interests, hobbies and passions that can bring soul mates together. Ask yourself the questions:

-         how many real passions for something you share together?

-         Do you both like the same or similar kind of music, composer?

-         Do you both like the same style books, games, other things?

-         Do you like the same places to walk, enjoy in nature?

-         Do you like the same kind of movies or just watching movies?

-         Do you have the same or similar political, ethical views?

Any of these answers will bring you closer to understand your partner and your own relationship. Have in mind that passion is not a short event or just an occasion (like walking in nature, or visiting museum) Passion is strong and constant interest for something and feeling of love, commitment and joy from dealing with your passion. How much this passion, interest or hobby is shared between you? Do you spend time together with that passion? For example, if you love flowers and gardening, does he? How much he is involved in gardening or in any of your passions? (dancing, cooking, studying, walking, camping, fishing…)

On another hand ask the question how much does he respect your own passions? Answers of all that issues will throw light on your real relationship and will guide you if it`s flourishing, or just simulation (love-longing relation).

IV. Thrill of the Heart ~

This is the last in my list, but in reality the first feeling you need to have to start a relationship. It can be also misleading and confusing, due to many reasons. Many people have feeling of “thrill of heart” in the beginning without to know any of the previous points (equal spiritual values, mutual connections..). That’s how they can make easily the wrong choice – they trust their “heart” but its actually their “attraction” that is leading. Heart desire is always connected to Mind and mindfulness. At least should be, in order to make right choices. That’s why many people in fake relationships have in the first place “physical attraction” and see it as “hearts desire”. This is a false desire and one of the reasons of “love-longing” relationships.

Relationship is not a “deal” or “acceptance” between two sides. There always has to be a thrill, a deeper conscious feeling of attraction and attachment. Always. Ask questions: how much he makes your heart sing?

How much you feel his feelings and understand his thoughts?

~ is he loving, does he share with you most things?

~ is he close to you or distant?

You can feel that easily with your heart, even if you don’t use intuition. The vibration of intimacy is quite clear.

All these aspects of real love relationship will develop and grow with the time, together with spiritual growth of both partners. They come together with some other qualities, to make the best relationship:

-         Faithfulness (being only devoted to your partner)

-         Truthfulness (always be open to each other and say the truth)

-         Honesty (be honest and never lie to your partner)

-         Sharing (share your love and dreams)

-         Caring and gentleness (show your partner daily how much he/ she means to you with simple gestures, gifts, smiles, words)

These are the main values shared from my angels, to point out for the strong basis of any love relationships.

Thank you for tuning in this perception about love- longing. Feel free to share it and add your comment below! 

nina Lea-nour *

@ angel medium 

Love Longing relationships -II

III.                   Unconditional love –what is?

   I would like to ask first another question – does unconditional love exist? The answer (also given from my angels) is yes, it does. But not everyone in his mind-pattern and spiritual level is appointed to reach the unconditional love. What is that feeling? This is the pure cosmic love send to us in form of cleansing divine Light from the Source (god) and encompassing all living things. Moreover, unconditional love is given for free, its easy to achieve (even earth people rarely can achieve it), as it’s the light inside your heart. To give unconditional love for others, first you need to have it by yourself – to love yourself unconditionally, or with pure heart, with open mind-flow. Why unconditional? That means simply without judgment. Judging others by looking from our own perspective and point is easy. Most people fall in trap of judgment, struggle with overbearing ideas or wrong concepts. Not judging is linked to one: let it be! Let things be as they are, no need of external or internal force to them. See them, observe them and love them as they are. Unconditional love means that your divine sparkle light within your Heart connects and feels the divine sparkle of light in heart of another. That’s how you can love everyone, if you reach to this level of mind. This is the pure Christ love. Humanity is not yet ready to pour such love in his heart. Unconditional means above all judgments, above Ego –mind, above restrictions and limitations. That’s the freedom of divine love. Its so easy to achieve, and yet so hard for us. Why is that so? Mostly because of Ego existing. When we become pure souls –or pure light (close to angels), we will achieve finally the unconditional love. All of us. Now this love will be felt just from some people, who have higher consciousness and spirit. Even so – everyone in his life time experienced unconditional divine love at least once. That could be a moment, seconds or less in time of eternity. But he felt this love. Such pure love is hard to be present or intermingling in our relationships. That’s because we are here in a hard form (clay level) so its not so easy to reach to pure bliss all the time.

    That’s why I want to give more details on how to recognize love-longing relationships and what to do to avid them? These steps will help us achieve higher level of love, coming closer to pure unconditional love.

These are four sure signs that you can look for, if you want to make the right choice for relationship or marriage.

1. Admiration

    Admiration is amazing feeling of respect, approval and warm impression from the person you love. To admire him goes far beyond the physical appearance or simple attraction, that is on body level. Admiration is attraction of the soul to the inner qualities, interests, likes, dislikes, moral values and views of this person. That means you love and approve his mindset, his ideas, his needs, his goals, the things he loves, or the way he deals with people and situations. Admiration is not adoration, but can have some of its qualities – you find qualities, traits, behavior, speech, or anything inner inside your partner attractive and worthy. Your value him and treasure him, you cherish him as a person.

Admiration is the first sign of mutual understanding and connection. If you don’t admire someone for his personal qualities, he cant become so close to you. Then you ll achieve closeness and gentleness in your love-relationship. This is the first trait that love-longing relations don’t possess. Admiration also shouldn’t be just from one side. If you admire your partner, but he doesn’t, something is missing in the puzzle. Ask yourself the question: do I feel admired and loved by him/ her? In what way he admires me and what are my personal qualities that he admires?

How I`m valuable for him and in what ways he shows me that its so?

Do I feel in his eyes that I am source of inspiration for him?

If the answer of any of these questions is “no”, then you need to look again and revise what is hidden for you in your current relationship. What are love pieces that are missing? Is it possible for you to achieve what you want? If you cant love your partner as he is, for what he is now.., then no change will be sustainable. You and him need to be inspired by each other, to share your ideas and admire what each others qualities. Admiration is like and approval on higher level, of the soul. You feel and see him/her as good or perfect in many respect. No need to admire him for all (as everyone has weak points), but admire him for any special thing.

Without admiration your relationship will be dull and without colors, and soon will fade away. Many people sadly maintain empty relationships just for purpose to “not be alone” to not lose something they have. These are false believes, so its much better to quit such love-longing relationship. 

* continue to part III ...

nina Lea-nour *

@ angel medium